Tuesday, June 29, 2010

Conference, big surpirse, conference and assumptions

So I decided that even after having some issues here at home that I was not gonna let that forbid me from going to conference. I waited till the last minute to pack, lol. But I finaly did and Carlos took me on my merry way to the hotel at Garden Grove, where the 2010 PHA Conference was gonna be held. We checked in and rested for awhile. I receved a text from Jas a PHriend that she had landed and was on her way to hotel. I decided to go down to lobby to meet with her and as I was strolling down the lobby I see her in the registration line, see shes me right away also and starts moving towrds me! I say to her no no dont get outta line I will come to you. I reach her and we give each other a big hug! It was so awesome to get to finaly meet her. We go up to her room that she was gonna share with Aylce another Phriend she introduces me to Alyce and a friend of Alyce! It was so nice to meet Alyce also, she is a very cool lady and I really liked her friend also. Next day Marcia, Ellen, Drini and Ali arrive it was very nice to meet ali also and good to see Drini, Marcia and Ellen again.. oh and I also met Hooper, Ellen's husband. We went and had dinner with Dale and Laura, Mason's dad and sister, It was a very nice dinner,, Marcia and I ended up talking about Mason's farm in Farmtown, that was funny we were gettinfg funny looks from Ellen , lol.
So later on that evening while back at Hotel I meet some more PHriends and what? to my surprise! I saw something that I was NOT expecting to see over there at conference. I mean my jaw just dropped I my chest started aching, my heart racing and I just wannted to throw-up! This was very stressful for me and I let the other party involved know exactly how I felt about it! I had to EAT verything up and ACT like if nothing had happened and contiunue on with conference.
We then went up to my room I had taken Coronitas, a Cornonita bucket (like the ones they ahve at resturant) salt and limes. I also took some Tequila and some shot glasses. Carlos helped me set everything up and Phriends started to arrive. Drini, Ali, Marcia, Jas, Ellen, Hooper and then Stu. Ellen and Hooper brought some wine and goodies. We had hotel maintence come and hook up Karokee for us so we had our shot of tequila, a few had coronitas and we started singing, both english and spanish songs.. that was really fun! We all had a great time. The other days were spent in sessions, talking eating and hust hanging out and meeting other Pher's.
Fast forward to Sunday. I come home and deciced to ck my emails and stuff. I see this email from the same person that I let know how I felt. I was told how this person felt in this email, which was fine! But with the ASSUMPTION that I did NOT get affected by all this and that this did NOT make me sick to my stomach! I ahve been more then kind and generous with this person and it really tikcs me to think that I am not allowed to feel.. I am also human and I also ahve PH.
I also started wondering about those that are my Phriends.. and never contacted me via text to ask me how I was at conference NOT ONE TEXT.. oh yeah I could of sent them a text.. but.. I didnt want them to think that I was bragging/ So hmmmm just make me wonder??
I decided that I would not ALLOW no one to take advantage of the fact that I am a nice person. I wish I were a mean BITCH and NOT give a hoot about anyone else.. but I cant be that way.. but I am sure gonna try not to let people step all over me.. I also realized that asking others to do things for me isnt such a good idea! I need to learn to STOP! lol
So I am home. I am glad to be home, but I sure wish I would of had more time to be with my PHriends. I miss them so much already :)
I know that when I am MAD as hell that I says things that may have hurt others, but when I realize wht I ahve done I do aplogize but others have to realize what they have also done. And I am not saying this because I want an apology or want anyone to keep apologizing to me beacuase I will not do that my self ( I mean keep saying I am sorry over and over again) But I need others to realize that I also HAVE feelings!

Thnx for reading

Cathy