Our Halloween Night at the PH Chat....

Was a BLAST...... we all had lots of fun trying to guess who we all were. I guessed a few... ejemmmm and we had a few cheaters! That didn't confess when they were guessed! LOL

But it was alot of fun. Now aren't you glad I come up with the idea?

We missed a few phriends that didn't show up. I am sure they were busy celebrating. I wish they would of been there though!

Well it is just 9:15pm here, but I am very tired and I think I am going to bed :)

Night all!

((((HUGS)))))

Trick or Treat!

BOOOOOOOO!!
I hope that everyone has a Happy Halloween! Don't eat all the candy that you are supposed to give out!

Lucky for me I don't eat sweets anymore :)

I TOLD......

But it was for a good reason. Remember my post where I showed off the bracelet that I made and I blogged and said that I had to make 2 of them for a ex co-worker? Well that's what I lied about. The bracelets that I made were actually for two of my Chat Phriends. You see they have B'days this month and I wanted to make something special for them. So that's when I decided to make the bracelets. Now one of my phriends celebrated her B'day yesterday OCt 28th. . Her name is JenC.

She called me as soon as she opened the envelope in which I sent it. She was so happy about it, I could tell by her tone of voice. And that made me happy also. I am glad that she enjoyed it and that she likes it.

She is so funny and she has been there for me. Like a daughter should be :)

So Jen I just wanted to let you know that I hope that you had a SPECIAL DAY and that you enjoyed every minute of it. I also appreciate everything that you have had to deal with me and my sobbing! I know that you have your own PH that you have to deal with. But you are always concerned about other PHer's. And you never complain about yourself. Please know that if you EVER, EVER need anything from me. I am here for you :)

The other bracelet that I made is for one of my other Phriends. Her name is MrsH. Now I know she doesn't read blogs, so I am not worried about her finding out before her Bday which is Oct. 31st. LOL.

Now, Elena even though you don't read blogs I will tell you right here anyway. That I also appreciate all the GOOD advice that you have given me about PH You have told me how to take the meds that sometimes don't work for me. Even the toxic water!, LOL I will never forget that one!

You in your own special way have been there for me and I will never forget that. And I hope that you too have a SPECIAL DAY!

Now the rest of my phriends, please dont be mad. I love you all. In someway or another you have also helped me. And who knows one of these days I might have to tell another little white lie :)

Please enjoy the rest of the day and thanks for reading!

Hubby is home :)

We got in this am at 2:00, OMG it was awful coming back across the border. This has never happened to us before. It took us 5 hours! YES, 5 hours to get acroos the border! I have no idea what was going on! It was terrible i was irritated and tired and sleepy! They kept shutting down the lanes, inspecting alot of the vehicles! When we finaly got up to the INS agent, we handed him our passports and he asked for my car registration! Oh, gawwwwd, they have never asked for that! So there I was looking through all the fricken crap that I have in the glove compartment and I handed him my DMV handicap placard registration, LOL. Well double crapola! I finally found it, he checked it, checked the vin number off my car to to make sure it matched! And he gave us our passports and registration back. We drove up a few miles and stopped. I had to go potty sooooo BAD! I had been holding it all those 5 hours. I thought I was going to pee in my pants! I didnt :)

W got home like I said at 2am. I got up at 9am :) I took my pills and I came to check the PH boards, my emails and last my blog!

I am waiting for my grandkids, then my hubby is taking us out for lunch. I am really tired.

Bye for now have a great day!

Hugs

Once in a big while my brain works! And I write...

Let me tell you though they are not the best poems ever. I just start writing what comes to mind and I try rhyming the words. I have posted a few to the left side of my blog. These are ones that I wrote in the past. I still have more but I need to find them, LOL.
I do have one that I wrote about PH. But I was thinking of posting that one in Nov. during PH Awareness Month.
Alot of my poems are in my old PC but I gave that to my older son. And he still has not copied them for me on CD, so that I can have them here. So... the ways things are going right now I have no idea when I will get them!
Maybe...... !!

LOL, I say that alot :) Hey.... maybe I should try and write a poem about that!!

Hope you all have a GREAT day and thanks for reading :)

HUGS

I am soooooooooo HAPPYYY!!!!

Just got a call from my husband. He is coming home Saturday!! YUPPYYYYYYY :)

I will have to see who takes me to go pick him up at the airport across the border. But I don't mind I just hope I can find someone ! That shouldn't be to hard right? LOL

((((HUGS))))))

UPDATE... I'm so MAD, can it get any worse?

Well my son Jose fianlly calls me at 10am. I was still upset and I didn't answer the phone, he left me a message.. Mom...... I am soooo sorry my alarm didn't go off and my phone is dead! Call me back when you get this message.

I call the Dr office first to ask them if I could still go in today and what time. They tell me come at 1:30pm. I call Jose back and I told him, so if you were alseep who took the kids to school? He tells me Sandra did. I tell him well she didn't answer her phone either. He tells me well I don't know whats wrong with her phone! So I start to tell him. Once a week Jose I just need you ONCE a week and you can't do this for me. He tells me isn't there anypne else that could of taken you? I SAID NO!.... He tells me what about your neighbor.. grrrrrrrrrr that made me more MAD when he said that. He knows already about my nosey neighbor and how I'm trying to cut her out of my life! Then he says, well do you still need to go I tell him YES! can you be here at 1pm? He tells me ok I will be there! He shows up at 12:45, LOL. I do my last run to the potty and we get in the car and leave. Sure enough we get there at 1:15pm. He asks me do you want me to wait? I said yes they are only going to take out my stiches. He says ok so they stay out in the car with the kids and Sandra.

Right at 1:30 they call me in and they take my stiches out. Dr talks to me a bit and tells me to make appt to come back in a month. I did and walked out... It was a litlle before 2pm.

Damn it! where are they?? grrrrrrrrr the STEAM is coming out agian!

I call him on the phone, he answers and I ask him why did you leave? He tells me you took more then and hour and we got tired of waiting! I tell him you know what! It was not more then an hour, we got here at 1:15pm my appt was at 1:30pm, they called me in right away I am out and its not even 2:00pm! So how can it be more then an hour???? I just hung up the phone.

He comes about 8-10 minutes later! Boyyyy was I steaming!! I get in the car, he asks me if it hurted I said NO! He drives me home, he gives me the keys and they all say bye to me. I said bye to them and I went in the house. I just broke down in tears.

I wanted to tell him so many things, but I didnt cause of the kids. I had to bite my tongue and hold it back.

I made dinner, my son Carlos came home in a good mood. I told him what happened and he gave me a BIG hug, he tells me ayyy momma, que bonita cuando estas enojada=how beautiful when you are mad! I couldn't be mad at him :)

I went into chat we had a GREAT conversation! We LOLed alot, like always and had fun! It was good!

BTW.. Mason came in for a while! It was so good to see him in chat again! He left early he said the game was on!! LOL

Ok now I gotta get ready to go to the marketa!

Have a great day all :)

((((HUGS))))

I AM SOOOO MAD!!!

I was supposed to be at my appt today to have my stitches removed. Well.... My older son never showed up! I called him about 4 million times! And I called my daughter-in-law also. Neither of them answered there freakin phone! And I did call my son yesterday evening to remind him! He said ok. I will be there at 8:30 am. At 8:30 am I went and got in my car, so that when he arrived all he had to do is was my wheelchair up on the ramp. I waited in the car until 9:15 am and NADA!! I am soooo psst!! I bet you can see steam coming out of my ears!

You know when both my daughter and son have needed me for loans! I have always been there for them, or whatever else they needed. But where are they when I need them?

I hate being in this damned wheelchair and having to depend on ANYONE! And that also includes my husband! I might as well be alone.

I wish I could just hop into my car and leave somewhere. I can't go in my wheelie because we are having winds again. Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.

Well, bye all I have to go figured out how to blow some steam.

Hope you all have a good day.

I still don't deserve it!

What I am talking about is my daughter Mercedes' phone number. She probably thinks that since I forget alot of things and she goofed up when she told me that she had given it to her ANUNTS on her DAD's side. That I don't remember her saying that. Yeah, her DAD that abandoned them as soon as we were separted deserves it more them me. Well his sisters do and don't know if she has given it to her DAD! Which is up to her and I don't care if she does or not, but what ticks me that I have always been there for her and I don't deserve it.

GRRRRRRRRR I hate when I feel like this. Her B'Day is coming up and I've been thinking about that and also she was supposed to drop by..uhhh Tuesday or Wednesday and no show! And no call and no email..... Tell you this really gets to me.

By all thanks for ready

Hope you have a Great Day! :)

(((HUGS)))))

Can you relate?

There are a few songs that Shania Twain sings that I really like. I have been listening to some of her old songs since they came out. There is this one song that I can really relate to. Even though it is a love song. I have wriiten the lyrics below, what I wrote in ( ) is how I relate myself to it.

"It Only Hurts When I'm Breathing"

Hope life's been good to you since you've been gone. ( the elephant)

I'm doin' fine now- I've finally moved on. (now that I know what I have)

It's not so bad-I'm not that sad.

I'm not surprised just how well I survived. ( with treament)

I'm over the worst, and I feel so alive. (ty GOD)

I can't complain-I'm free again. (of not knowing what was wrong)

And it only hurts, when I'm breathing. ( SOB)

My heart only breaks, when its beating. (chest pains)

My dreams only die, when I'm dreaming. (for a cure)

So, I hold my breathe to forget.

Don't think I'm lyin' 'round cryin' at night. ( im over that)

There's no need to worry, I'm really alright.

I've never looked back- as a matter of fact. ( I've accepted what I have)

It only hurts when I breathe.

Mmm, no I've never looked back- as a matter of fact.

Hurts when I'm breathing.

Breaks when it's beating.

Die when I'm dreaming.

It only hurts when I breathe.

LOL, ok I'm I nuts, looney, crazy. Because I can relate to this song in that way?

Are there any songs you can relate to?

Nite all :)

A pic of the BOYZ

These are my 5 grandboys. My daughter Mercedes sent this pic to me last week via email. I emailed her back and thanked her for the pic and I told her that I wanted to add it to my blog!

Opps..... She emailed me back and asked for my blog addy so that she could see it. Well I emailed her back and explained to her that I didn't want any family members reading my blog right now.

I told her that only my phriends were allowed to read it. That they knew what I was going through and that I knew what they were going through. I added to say that both my sons knew that I was blogging, but that neither of them knew my addy. And when the time came for me to leave this earth. They had instructions on giving out my addy to whom ever family member that wanted it. I ended the email by telling her that I hope she didn't mind my decission to do this.

Well, she didn't email me back either way. So I decided to go ahead and post it :)

Anyway they have there hair like the Beatles style. I told them that, when they came to my son's B'day Celebration. I think they look really cute with there hair like that. They are all thin so it fits them well. I don't see them very often, daughter always busy to bring them over. But I'm glad she sent me this recent pic of them :)

BTW..... Did I do wrong by not wanting her to have my addy? Did I maybe make things worse?

Have a great day all!

((((((HUGS)))))))

Just showing off

Today I had planned to go to the pharmacy to pick-up a refill. But it is cold and windy out, so I decided I better stay in.

I have been putting off making a few bracelets that a ex co-worker emailed me about making for her. My hands having been shaking lately. But today they where good to go. So I took my supplies out and started on the first one! I did have to take some of it apart 2 times. My eyesight is not the best anymore and I have not been able to find a magnifying table lamp.

I finaly finished it and took pics! Not the best pics in the world. I don't know if its me, the camera, or the sparkle of the crystals, LOL. But there they are.

I made this bracelet with Swarvoski Crystal Beads and a Sterling Sliver Paw Clasp and a 3 bar dasiy spacer. That allows me to make it a 3 strand bracelet. It is one of my favorite designs, even though it takes longer to make and if you make a boo-boo sometimes you have to take the whole thing apart!

Enjoy the pics :) And I won't be mad if you all call me a show off!

BTW, I have to get to work on the next one!

Addiction

Well, now that Sprint finally got our phone situation straighten out. I am able to call my hubby every morning and he calls me every evening to tell me good night! Silly huh?

Maybe not! I wasn't doing so well the first few days after he left, since I wasn't able to speak to him. I am doing a bit better. I still miss him a whole lot. But my day seems to be better now. And I am sleeping a bit better also :)

One night I was in chat and someone asked if I had heard from him and with a BIG smile from ear to ear I said Yes!!! My addiction called me this evening. LOL Now that just came out of nowhere so now I call him my addiction. But it's a good addiction :)

I am so lucky to have him in my life. He also told me that he MIGHT come back earlier then he had planned, LOL I guess he can not get used to the life over there.... He won't admit that he misses me. You know, one of those macho men! But it's ok if he doesn't because I know he does :).

Well this is it for now... I decided to blog before I get a hint from my phriend, Jen. Telling me it's time to update! Love Ya, Jen :)

(((((HUGS)))))

Baa, Baa Black Sheep

I have always conisdered myself to be the black sheep of the family. For a ahile I even thought I was adopted. And to tell you the truth I still do sometimes. Even though my older sister finally got FED up with me saying it and told me that she was there with mom when I was born. Oh... but that didn't stop me. I went on to say, well... maybe I was exchanged at birth! She told me I was crazy.

So why do I think like this! Well, I am the loudest, the meanest, the fattest, the tallest (even taller then my brothers). I consider myself the ugliest of all my sisters. You name it, I am it! I hold grudges for a long time. I can't seem to let go of them. It's very hard for me to forgive, when someone has really hurt me. I cry all the time for anything! Even before PH, only difference I cry more now. I used to do no, no's. I was always afraid of being alone I still am. I am very frank! I tell people how it is, whether they want to hear it or not. Sometimes I get in big SHIT though for doing that! I also have a SHIT list longer then Calif. YIKES!! Seems everyone is on it.

I was the first of the family to say a cuss word in front of them :( They couldn't believe it when I did) Oy my!

I know there's more but I can't remember right now. So.... with all those faults, do you blame me for thinking thata way? Maybe not. But.... I still consider myself the Black Sheep of the Family.

Baa, baa black sheep!

Have a Good Day, Thanks for reading

Happy Birthday Carlos!

A few of my phriends from chat have been asking questions about my son Carlos' Birthday Celebration on Sunday October 5th. I told them that I wanted to wait for the pics that we took. But my eldest son Jose took the camera home and he has not brought it back.

So I guess pic will have to be posted at a later date.

I got up at 5am. I've been doing that lately, I just can't sleep. I started cooking. I got Carlos up at 9am, he got ready and we went to pick-up his cake at Sam's Club. It wasn't ready! Second time that's happened. I asked to speak to the manager and I asked her. "What is the point of the bakery personnel asking us what time we want the cake if it's not going to be ready when we request it? I also told her the last time I ordered a cake from here I was late to a meeting, because the cake was not ready. Well she gave me her apologies and reduced the price of the cake to 1/2 the original cost. That went very well!

OK we get home, my neighbor came and helped me with the rest, dice up veggies, prepare the meat, mix this and mix that. My eldest arrived and started up the BBQ grill. And soon he was grilling.

My daughter did show up with the boys! It was emotional for me. She gave me a BIG hug and I could not hold back the tears. (I even made my neighbor cry). We talked a bit we ate, she stayed a few hours then she left. She said she had to go somewhere else to go. Well at least I got to see her those few hours.

More people showed up everyone ate.. boyyy can my son's friends eat! I mean all they wanted was burgers and carne asada.... NO BEANS, NO SALAD, NO TORTILLAS! Wowww it was scary how they were eating. I ended up sending my son back to the store for more meat and more buns, LOL But that was ok.... at least my son had a good time!

Ok, ok, now the girlfriend part. My son Jose, his wife and my son Carlos went to pick her up. She is very petite. She was sorta of quite and I would ask her things and she would say I dunnooo and would say to my son, Carlos what is the right answer? LOL. I think I embarressed her. One of the times that I asked her we were picking up trash, me in my wheelie and with my grabber in hand. I asked her do you want to feel right at home ? Cause if you do come on, you are going to help me pick up trash! :) I'm mean huh? LOL I got a kick out of asking her that, she got embarressed. And I asked her do you know spanish, she says I understand a little but I dont speak it. Well..... I told her here you have to learn it! 'She just started laughing.

She was ok... I mean what can I say first time I met her. My son asked me what I thought of her, I told him well she seems nice but I have to get to konw her more. He was ok with that.

So that's it my phriends, we all had a good time. Of course I was pooped by the ended of the day. Because even though I am stuck in my wheelie I try to do as much as possible and I do get tired.

Well it's 6:27 am here the sun is coming up and I need to get ready to take a stroll in my wheelie down to the supermarket :)

You all have a wpnderful day!

(((((HUGS))))))

Lost little puppy

OK, Where do I start? My husband has only been gone 4 days and I feel totaly lost without him. I am trying to keep busy, but....... I just can't function. I am not sleeping I toss and turn all night! Gosh, I hate this feeling. I mean he has been gone before, but since my Dx he has never left me. Yeah, last year I went to Puerto Vallarta for 2 weeks and he didn't go with me. But my son Carlos did and he actually slept with me. And also I would talk to my husband everyday. So that made it easier. But now for some reason, maybe because its another city. I can't call him and Sprint is of no help.

I am freaking out here, I keep thinking... OMG what if something where to happen to him, how would I deal with his loss? I have even prayed and asked GOD to please take me first and not him. I know I have to stop thinking like this. I can't STOP!

Out of no where for every little thing I just cry. I even get headaches now when I cry. It feels like if I just turn on my tears and there they come. I am a mess. I try to take a nap during the day, since I don't sleep at night and I don't sleep either. I just toss and turn.

I wish I could talk to him everyday even for a minute. I know that would help. but I have to wait until he calls me from a lan line and that is hard because of the area. Not everyone has a phone over there.

Sooooooo here I am like a lost puppie. I wish the days would get easier for me. It seems that they are getting harder. And going by sooooooo slowwwwww.

Take care all, thanks for reading

My husband left today.

He had his brother pick him up here at the house. He didn't want me to take him to the airport and watch him get on the plane. I miss him already. I missed him the moment he walked out the door. I am a mess right now and I just don't know what to do. He will call me but not everyday, because of the bad phone service over there it will be hard. So I will see how I handle this.

Also, today is my son Carlos' Birthday, he turned 17. We will celebrate his Birthday on Sunday October 5th... A small BBQ cook-out, nothing big. And we are supposed to meet his girlfriend. YIKES!

Well I am going to go and try to watch some TV. Maybe it will relax me.

Night all!